~ “Ready-Made Ad”, The Liquor Book, by Charles Austin Bates, 1899
gin is, in fact, the best of medicines for women
Gin always does the trick.
In addition, drinking gin causes a remarkable improvement in the appearance of the people around you.
Sounds reasonable to me.
(Warning: The improved effects on your appearance are only temporary and will be replaced by dark circles, smeared...
over 100 years later, the pitch is still the same…